The Sober Swipe Guide
I signed up for eight different dating apps to show you how to navigate them as a non-drinker - and an invite to an IRL dating event.
It's safe to say that navigating the dating world can be challenging. And dating as someone who doesn’t drink comes with an extra hurdle: A lot of first dates revolve around going for drinks, and we know that a little bit of “liquid courage” often helps people loosen up in the potentially awkward situation of meeting up with a complete stranger. My friend Tawny Lara even wrote an entire book about sober dating and relationships (it’s called Dry Humping and you should totally read it!)
Aside from that, since consuming alcohol is often considered “normal”, there is still a stigma attached with not drinking: Why aren’t they drinking? Is that person an “addict” that may have other “harmful behaviors” or may be at risk of relapsing? Are they someone who doesn’t like to have fun or let loose? Do they have any illnesses that prevent them from consuming alcohol? What is wrong with them?
Fortunately, as being “sober-curious” or abstaining from alcohol becomes more widespread, a lot of people are open to - or even appreciate - dating someone who is a mindful drinker, or doesn’t drink at all. And dating apps are catching up: Most mainstream dating apps now allow users to specify how much they drink (or use other substances) and let them set a search filter for those habits too. Additionally, there are now even dating apps that are explicitly aimed at sober or sober-curious users.
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